Sweat. Sweat like I've never experienced, pouring out of my pores at an alarming rate, flowing down my skin and cascading onto the wooden gym floor. It's the oldest gym in Manila. Alex used to play here as a kid 50 years ago, but it reminds me a lot of an oven. I'd ditched my sopping, sweat saturated shirt half an hour before, but after the fourth "last" game, my drechedness has reached a new high.
Drenchedness. . . Is that even a word? It is now. It's all I can think of to describe my glistening skin and soggy shorts. But this is basketball in the tropics, and it's what I love doing probably more than anything else in the world.
As I joined my fifth (and eventually final) "last" game, my mind wanders back to different moments in my life that served as preparation for this ministry. I picture the community center court in Singapore that I went to every night after dinner for years on end. I picture the court at my school at lunch time, and sheepishly walking into fifth period class with a drenching white uniform shirt. I recall the sight and smell of the steam rolling off my body and joining the medley of stifling humidity and cigarette smoke of onlookers after a long evening of basketball. Basketball. . . That's what I'm playing at the moment.
It's like clockwork to me now. Instead of tick, tick tick, the syncopated BAK BAK BAK, BAKBAK of the basketball permeates the humidity. The feeling of its dark, worn leather on my fingertips as I dribble is a comforting, familiar feeling in every part of the world. As I stare forward at the rim, some 35 feet away, my peripheral vision takes in the players moving around haphazardly, a chaotic and beautiful dance number on broadway. This is my stage; this is OUR stage, and we love the moment.
It's after the game now— after the respectful handshakes and thank you's, the high fives, the cacophony of congratulations and frustrations in different languages. . . And we gather together and pray. The big, scary looking guy with two arm sleeves and the beginning of a leg sleeve of tattoos. The 61 year old former professional basketball player. Fifteen teenagers who spectated the game sheepishly come forward to satisfy their curiosity. And there he his, the imposing white boy who sweats a lot, sitting in a personal puddle of perspiration. . . that's me.
Pastor begins an introductory speech in a mix of Tagalog and English. I remember that they used to call it Taglish when I lived here as a kid. Alex shares his testimony. They surprise me by asking me to share. I tell them about the time I broke my leg and learned that the beauty of basketball had been wasted on my own selfish desire for popularity and fame. I tell them that basketball, a language that we can all speak fluently, is only worth it if it is played for the glory and praise of a Lord and King that deserves it. Some of them nod. I taste salt as I'm speaking. We pray. Some repeat the prayer to become followers of Jesus. I hope Pastor can help them grow. I hope they're sincere about it.
We start packing up. I forgot a change of clothes. I'm still soaked as we walk out and look for a jeepnee to take us to the train station. At the train station too. In the car back from the train station. I arrive home 2 hours later; I'm still wet.
But I'm "home" now. Really, I've been at home the whole day. For some people it might seem exotic, exhausting, exhilarating or extreme. But for me, this is just expected. I feel pretty lucky. Then I fall asleep.
Friday, June 26, 2015
Thursday, April 30, 2015
White Privilege and Racism, and What We can Do
For a long time I have remained silent on the issue of racism and white privilege in America. But I refuse to remain silent, as I believe that the church needs to be at the forefront of social activism and reform. The United States needs social reform. The United States needs Jesus. The church needs to be the hands and feet of God in this country and around the world. Yes, there are problems abroad, but it has become increasingly evident that if we do not fight for social reform here in the US, our military, aid, and foreign policy will have no business or ability to begin regulating other countries' affairs, internal or international.
First, I'll begin by telling a little bit about myself. The fact is, I know what it's like to be a minority. When I turned 12, my family moved to Singapore and I was put into a school at which for many years I was the only white male in my entire class. My best friends from 7th grade through 12th grade were people of Asian descent. In some ways, "white privilege" still did exist, especially in American circles within Singapore, but more often I was looked at differently and spoken to differently because of the color of my skin. Some educated Singaporeans and others simply viewed me as a stupid, loud American. Still others assumed that I was rich and had no interest in their culture, food or customs. Very few actually took the time to get to know me in a meaningful way and find out that despite my white skin, long nose and brown, curly hair, I was more like them than they had ever imagined, and I desired to learn everything about them— their slang, culture, games, language, customs and holidays.
This upbringing led me to have an acute fascination with culture, context, language and basic anthropology of different people groups. This has helped me to understand not only the Singaporean culture I was a part of, but also begin to embrace the people and cultures of the surrounding Southeast Asian countries and beyond. My friends and acquaintances through basketball and other activities broadened my cultural sensitivity and outlook to include people from almost every country in the world. I thank God for the chance to have been exposed to an interact with people of so many different cultures. This has formed the way that I interact with people who are not like me here in the US, because basically NOBODY here is like me or has had the same upbringing as I've had.
So, you might ask, what does this have to do with "white privilege" and racism in the United States. Because of my background, I've been able to better understand the issues that face both me and my black brothers and sisters in Christ, and has given me a desire to understand and build meaningful relationships with them. These relationships have helped me expand my own view regarding this issue. This has led me to realize a few things.
1. I am at an advantage over my black brothers and sisters here in the US because of my skin color.
Yeah, I said it. Not JUST because of my upbringing, not JUST because of the (mostly) financially stable life that I lived, and not JUST because I have two loving, educated parents, one of whom has a Ph.D. My white skin gives me unfair advantages in the workplace, when buying cars and when simply walking down the street.
Many times I have been walking out and about in Chicago and NOT been stopped by police officers, simply because I am white. One time my roommate and I were hanging out in a rough part of Chicago in the middle of the night talking about life and eating Subway on the steps of an old abandoned cathedral. A police patrol was driving by and spotted us sitting on the steps. Coming to an abrupt halt, the policeman rolled down his window and with concern told us that this was a "rough part of town" and that we should leave. I have not a shadow of a doubt in my mind that the police officer wouldn't have said the same thing had we been two African American males. And unfortunately, I've heard too many stories of police brutality from my own trusted friends to believe that there is not a problem in either police policy or application of that policy.
I understand that policemen don't have an easy job, but I also know that it is unacceptable for someone in a position of power to abuse that power and take advantage of a situation knowing that they will not be punished for their actions.
2. The American church as a whole has been too content to sit back and allow racial division to sink its ugly teeth into the way that we worship our creator... the creator of all nations, peoples, tribes and languages.
When was the last time that your church had a joint event or outreach with another church that was not homogenous to yours? Awhile? Never?
Now, when was the last time that your preacher criticized another church body or expression because of the way that they did worship or their service?
Last Sunday? The past month? Year? SURELY not never.
This kind of teaching from the pulpit unconsciously plants seeds of an egotistic we-them mentality in our minds and does not promote orthodoxy or correct teaching. Instead, it promotes disunity.
One of the posters up around my campus begs the question "why is Sunday the most segregated day of the week?" My first reaction to that poster was that diversity in church is appreciated and needed to begin to fully encompass the nature of God's revelation to us, something no single church building could ever hope to achieve. But the separation is evident— not only in music, preaching, and liturgy, but also outside the church. Why are we slow to unite as one and enjoy the solidarity of the full expression of God's church? Will we never experience even a part of this until Jesus comes back?
3. Governmental policy change will not fix this issue.
The governmental system that we have today is unfortunately largely controlled by corporate interests and wealthy (primarily) white males. These individuals and corporations do not have a great care or understanding of these issues. Even if meaningful policies, willfully crafted and selflessly sacrificial in nature were to be passed (Yeah, right. . . red lining, gentrification and an unfair judicial system are the results of governmental policy), if regular citizens were not committed to making a difference, the policies would have no meaning.
So, how can we fix this issue?
In short, we can't. This issue, much as the other issues that the world faces today are heart issues and sin issues. The Bible says that the heart is deceitful above all things. My heart deceived me into believing that if I refused to talk about or acknowledge the existence and prevalence of my own white privilege and advantage, and the inferred disadvantage of other black citizens, then it would simply disappear. That is a lie. But there are many practical things that we can do to help begin to solve the problem.
1. Be intentional about having genuine, humble, inquiring discourse with people of ALL races, classes, creeds and religions. This is not easy to do. This does not happen on accident.
"Intentional" is a Christian "buzzword," but it accurately describes what we have to do in order to be informed and to enact social change. I have no doubt that had I not been a part of local ministries in and around Chicago ministering to and alongside predominantly African Americans that I would have had a different opinion on both the racial tensions taking place here on my own campus, and in Baltimore, Saint Louis, New York, Chicago and around the U.S.
I know for a fact that MOST of the issues that we face today would be greatly reduced, if not eradicated if white people took the time to hear, understand and empathize with the pain of their black brothers and sisters.
2. Have the humility to realize when you are given or are giving preferential treatment to someone because they are of the same race or background as you. This goes for all people. Violence, hatred and seditiousness are not to originate or be propagated by Jesus' holy bride, the Church. These issues will not be fixed by increasing dividing lines or racial separation, but by a mutual respect and appreciation for the cultural diversity that exists between God's children.
3. PRAY
If these issues don't break your heart, pray that God will give you the heart and understanding to realize why they should? Pray. If your heart is broken for the inequality, for the tens of thousands of black aborted babies, and if you cry for the mothers and families of Freddie Gray, Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin and thousands of others who have been killed by police officers, and the HUNDREDS of thousands killed by murder, much of which could have been drastically reduced if true care were put into legislature that did not systematically oppress and undervalue minority life. Pray. If you're incensed and ready to FIGHT and KILL for action and reform, pray that your anger would be righteous and directed into making a change for the better. Pray.
*disclaimer: I know that I have spoken about most of these issues in black and white terms (pardon the unintended pun), but I am aware that people of MANY different races and ethnicities are present and unrepresented in the United States discourse regarding racism and social justice. For the sake of brevity and the limited understanding I have of the breadth of this issue, I have focused my exposition on the relationship between black and white people.
First, I'll begin by telling a little bit about myself. The fact is, I know what it's like to be a minority. When I turned 12, my family moved to Singapore and I was put into a school at which for many years I was the only white male in my entire class. My best friends from 7th grade through 12th grade were people of Asian descent. In some ways, "white privilege" still did exist, especially in American circles within Singapore, but more often I was looked at differently and spoken to differently because of the color of my skin. Some educated Singaporeans and others simply viewed me as a stupid, loud American. Still others assumed that I was rich and had no interest in their culture, food or customs. Very few actually took the time to get to know me in a meaningful way and find out that despite my white skin, long nose and brown, curly hair, I was more like them than they had ever imagined, and I desired to learn everything about them— their slang, culture, games, language, customs and holidays.
This upbringing led me to have an acute fascination with culture, context, language and basic anthropology of different people groups. This has helped me to understand not only the Singaporean culture I was a part of, but also begin to embrace the people and cultures of the surrounding Southeast Asian countries and beyond. My friends and acquaintances through basketball and other activities broadened my cultural sensitivity and outlook to include people from almost every country in the world. I thank God for the chance to have been exposed to an interact with people of so many different cultures. This has formed the way that I interact with people who are not like me here in the US, because basically NOBODY here is like me or has had the same upbringing as I've had.
So, you might ask, what does this have to do with "white privilege" and racism in the United States. Because of my background, I've been able to better understand the issues that face both me and my black brothers and sisters in Christ, and has given me a desire to understand and build meaningful relationships with them. These relationships have helped me expand my own view regarding this issue. This has led me to realize a few things.
1. I am at an advantage over my black brothers and sisters here in the US because of my skin color.
Yeah, I said it. Not JUST because of my upbringing, not JUST because of the (mostly) financially stable life that I lived, and not JUST because I have two loving, educated parents, one of whom has a Ph.D. My white skin gives me unfair advantages in the workplace, when buying cars and when simply walking down the street.
Many times I have been walking out and about in Chicago and NOT been stopped by police officers, simply because I am white. One time my roommate and I were hanging out in a rough part of Chicago in the middle of the night talking about life and eating Subway on the steps of an old abandoned cathedral. A police patrol was driving by and spotted us sitting on the steps. Coming to an abrupt halt, the policeman rolled down his window and with concern told us that this was a "rough part of town" and that we should leave. I have not a shadow of a doubt in my mind that the police officer wouldn't have said the same thing had we been two African American males. And unfortunately, I've heard too many stories of police brutality from my own trusted friends to believe that there is not a problem in either police policy or application of that policy.
I understand that policemen don't have an easy job, but I also know that it is unacceptable for someone in a position of power to abuse that power and take advantage of a situation knowing that they will not be punished for their actions.
2. The American church as a whole has been too content to sit back and allow racial division to sink its ugly teeth into the way that we worship our creator... the creator of all nations, peoples, tribes and languages.
When was the last time that your church had a joint event or outreach with another church that was not homogenous to yours? Awhile? Never?
Now, when was the last time that your preacher criticized another church body or expression because of the way that they did worship or their service?
Last Sunday? The past month? Year? SURELY not never.
This kind of teaching from the pulpit unconsciously plants seeds of an egotistic we-them mentality in our minds and does not promote orthodoxy or correct teaching. Instead, it promotes disunity.
One of the posters up around my campus begs the question "why is Sunday the most segregated day of the week?" My first reaction to that poster was that diversity in church is appreciated and needed to begin to fully encompass the nature of God's revelation to us, something no single church building could ever hope to achieve. But the separation is evident— not only in music, preaching, and liturgy, but also outside the church. Why are we slow to unite as one and enjoy the solidarity of the full expression of God's church? Will we never experience even a part of this until Jesus comes back?
3. Governmental policy change will not fix this issue.
The governmental system that we have today is unfortunately largely controlled by corporate interests and wealthy (primarily) white males. These individuals and corporations do not have a great care or understanding of these issues. Even if meaningful policies, willfully crafted and selflessly sacrificial in nature were to be passed (Yeah, right. . . red lining, gentrification and an unfair judicial system are the results of governmental policy), if regular citizens were not committed to making a difference, the policies would have no meaning.
So, how can we fix this issue?
In short, we can't. This issue, much as the other issues that the world faces today are heart issues and sin issues. The Bible says that the heart is deceitful above all things. My heart deceived me into believing that if I refused to talk about or acknowledge the existence and prevalence of my own white privilege and advantage, and the inferred disadvantage of other black citizens, then it would simply disappear. That is a lie. But there are many practical things that we can do to help begin to solve the problem.
1. Be intentional about having genuine, humble, inquiring discourse with people of ALL races, classes, creeds and religions. This is not easy to do. This does not happen on accident.
"Intentional" is a Christian "buzzword," but it accurately describes what we have to do in order to be informed and to enact social change. I have no doubt that had I not been a part of local ministries in and around Chicago ministering to and alongside predominantly African Americans that I would have had a different opinion on both the racial tensions taking place here on my own campus, and in Baltimore, Saint Louis, New York, Chicago and around the U.S.
I know for a fact that MOST of the issues that we face today would be greatly reduced, if not eradicated if white people took the time to hear, understand and empathize with the pain of their black brothers and sisters.
2. Have the humility to realize when you are given or are giving preferential treatment to someone because they are of the same race or background as you. This goes for all people. Violence, hatred and seditiousness are not to originate or be propagated by Jesus' holy bride, the Church. These issues will not be fixed by increasing dividing lines or racial separation, but by a mutual respect and appreciation for the cultural diversity that exists between God's children.
3. PRAY
If these issues don't break your heart, pray that God will give you the heart and understanding to realize why they should? Pray. If your heart is broken for the inequality, for the tens of thousands of black aborted babies, and if you cry for the mothers and families of Freddie Gray, Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin and thousands of others who have been killed by police officers, and the HUNDREDS of thousands killed by murder, much of which could have been drastically reduced if true care were put into legislature that did not systematically oppress and undervalue minority life. Pray. If you're incensed and ready to FIGHT and KILL for action and reform, pray that your anger would be righteous and directed into making a change for the better. Pray.
*disclaimer: I know that I have spoken about most of these issues in black and white terms (pardon the unintended pun), but I am aware that people of MANY different races and ethnicities are present and unrepresented in the United States discourse regarding racism and social justice. For the sake of brevity and the limited understanding I have of the breadth of this issue, I have focused my exposition on the relationship between black and white people.
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Ten Laughable Lifting Misconceptions (That I Have Personally Heard/Experienced)
When it comes to hobbies, it's natural that we find a niche of people we are comfortable with who have similar interests and become friends with them. It's also natural for stigmas to arise around these friend groups, as with any organized activity. If you're in the math club, you may hear math jokes and be expected to ace every text and exam thrown your way. If you play violin, people will expect you to be refined, elegant and conservative (all generalizations, so just bear with me.) Despite these stereotypes sometimes being true, often they are not. So without further ado, I present 10 things that I have heard with my own ears from people either talking about or to me as it relates to going to the gym.
1. Misconception: "You wear tight fitting clothing because it shows off your muscles."
The truth is: I have probably gained ten pounds in the last four months and between the amount of dirty clothes in my hamper, food that I've been buying because I eat at least four meals a day, and how expensive Tic-Tacs are in Chicago gas stations, I can't really afford to overhaul my whole wardrobe every time a T-shirt becomes too small.
2. Misconception: "Once you lift for awhile you won't be sore anymore after you workout."
The truth is: When I woke up this morning it took me a solid ten minutes to get out of bed, and I had to take the elevator because I'd probably sit down and have a mid-flight crisis if I tried to take the stairs. Also, if you poke me in the chest after chest day we're not friends anymore. (just kidding, but give me a few minutes while I hold back my tears.)
5. Misconception: "Shaker bottles are only for protein shakes or pre-workout or steroids or something"
The truth is: My shaker bottle is also my water bottle, my coffee mug, my tambourine and the cup I use to water the plant in my room (thanks for the plant, Mom.) If you ask me in class if I'm drinking a protein shake, the answer is probably no.
4. Misconception: "I don't drink protein (or take X suppliment) because it's cheating and if I were to lift, I wouldn't want to be a cheater."
The truth is: You are probably too lazy to get in the gym in the first place— and that's probably just an excuse. If you're lifting enough weights and doing it correctly, you'll realize that having good nutrition is essential to actually building muscle and not becoming fatigued! I have always thought of it like trying to hunt deer with a couple of pebbles and a Nerf gun. . . You can kind of do it, I guess, but you're just making it unnecessarily difficult and unhealthy for yourself.
5. Misconception: "Saying 'Do you even lift, bro' is funny and original, especially after I obviously just lifted."
The truth is: That comment/question was a little bit funny the first 50 times I heard it. But after the 99999th time I got a little worn out towards it. I can take sarcasm, but if you want to dish it, be ready to get some back. ;)
6. Misconception: "Creatine is an awful and dangerous supplement and if you take it, you'll get bloated and ruin your liver/ creatine is basically steroids."The truth is: Creatine is THE MOST researched and widely accepted, safest and cheapest supplement on the market. Not only does it occur naturally in the body and is used in different forms to transport water, nutrients and phosphates to the muscles, but if you have a steak you're eating creatine! Most of the hate on creatine is because of lack of knowledge, but seriously. . . Do some homework on it before you believe what aunt Gertrude said at the family reunion two years ago while she was probably a bit tipsy.
7. Misconception: "I think that hearing about your uncle/ friend/ dog's cousin's original owner back when he lived in Massachusetts's 35 year old secret training methods will help me."
The truth is: I have done my research and know very well what works and doesn't work. If I wanted to work my chest out every day for 2 months straight, I would start by kissing all of my joints and muscular balance goodbye and setting up an appointment to the doctor's office.
8. Misconception: "Once you stop lifting weights, all of your muscle will just turn into fat anyway."
The truth is: I barely even want to address this one because it's just absurd. Generally, people get more out of shape as they age anyway, and attributing fat gain to training muscles is bogus! Not only does muscle not "turn into" fat, lifting weights properly improves bone density, posture, cardiovascular/cardiorespiratory systems, and metabolism.
9. Misconception: "I don't detect the sarcasm in your voice when you ask me 'Do you like, go to the gym every day?'"
The truth is: I do try to go to the gym every day, but for the same reason that you watch Netflix and eat chips for 2 hours before bed every night— I like doing it. If you'd like to call my hobby an addiction, that's fine by me, but check to make sure you're not spending an hour or so a day watching your favorite TV show before you're so quick to point the finger.
10. Misconception: "Lifting makes you angry and hormonal and 'Alpha' and aggressive."
If you know me, you know that I genuinely try to like every person that I meet and at least give them a chance, and more often than not quite a few chances before I make judgement calls about their character. If this is the view that you have of people that lift weights, I guess that's fine, but I hope that I've at least cleared up some misconceptions about us gym rats!
If you need me I'll be wearing a shirt that's too small, drinking Arnold Palmer out of my shaker bottle and asking everyone entering the library if they even lift.
Until next time!
Josh
1. Misconception: "You wear tight fitting clothing because it shows off your muscles."
The truth is: I have probably gained ten pounds in the last four months and between the amount of dirty clothes in my hamper, food that I've been buying because I eat at least four meals a day, and how expensive Tic-Tacs are in Chicago gas stations, I can't really afford to overhaul my whole wardrobe every time a T-shirt becomes too small.
2. Misconception: "Once you lift for awhile you won't be sore anymore after you workout."
The truth is: When I woke up this morning it took me a solid ten minutes to get out of bed, and I had to take the elevator because I'd probably sit down and have a mid-flight crisis if I tried to take the stairs. Also, if you poke me in the chest after chest day we're not friends anymore. (just kidding, but give me a few minutes while I hold back my tears.)
5. Misconception: "Shaker bottles are only for protein shakes or pre-workout or steroids or something"
The truth is: My shaker bottle is also my water bottle, my coffee mug, my tambourine and the cup I use to water the plant in my room (thanks for the plant, Mom.) If you ask me in class if I'm drinking a protein shake, the answer is probably no.
4. Misconception: "I don't drink protein (or take X suppliment) because it's cheating and if I were to lift, I wouldn't want to be a cheater."
The truth is: You are probably too lazy to get in the gym in the first place— and that's probably just an excuse. If you're lifting enough weights and doing it correctly, you'll realize that having good nutrition is essential to actually building muscle and not becoming fatigued! I have always thought of it like trying to hunt deer with a couple of pebbles and a Nerf gun. . . You can kind of do it, I guess, but you're just making it unnecessarily difficult and unhealthy for yourself.
5. Misconception: "Saying 'Do you even lift, bro' is funny and original, especially after I obviously just lifted."
The truth is: That comment/question was a little bit funny the first 50 times I heard it. But after the 99999th time I got a little worn out towards it. I can take sarcasm, but if you want to dish it, be ready to get some back. ;)
6. Misconception: "Creatine is an awful and dangerous supplement and if you take it, you'll get bloated and ruin your liver/ creatine is basically steroids."The truth is: Creatine is THE MOST researched and widely accepted, safest and cheapest supplement on the market. Not only does it occur naturally in the body and is used in different forms to transport water, nutrients and phosphates to the muscles, but if you have a steak you're eating creatine! Most of the hate on creatine is because of lack of knowledge, but seriously. . . Do some homework on it before you believe what aunt Gertrude said at the family reunion two years ago while she was probably a bit tipsy.
7. Misconception: "I think that hearing about your uncle/ friend/ dog's cousin's original owner back when he lived in Massachusetts's 35 year old secret training methods will help me."
The truth is: I have done my research and know very well what works and doesn't work. If I wanted to work my chest out every day for 2 months straight, I would start by kissing all of my joints and muscular balance goodbye and setting up an appointment to the doctor's office.
8. Misconception: "Once you stop lifting weights, all of your muscle will just turn into fat anyway."
The truth is: I barely even want to address this one because it's just absurd. Generally, people get more out of shape as they age anyway, and attributing fat gain to training muscles is bogus! Not only does muscle not "turn into" fat, lifting weights properly improves bone density, posture, cardiovascular/cardiorespiratory systems, and metabolism.
9. Misconception: "I don't detect the sarcasm in your voice when you ask me 'Do you like, go to the gym every day?'"
The truth is: I do try to go to the gym every day, but for the same reason that you watch Netflix and eat chips for 2 hours before bed every night— I like doing it. If you'd like to call my hobby an addiction, that's fine by me, but check to make sure you're not spending an hour or so a day watching your favorite TV show before you're so quick to point the finger.
10. Misconception: "Lifting makes you angry and hormonal and 'Alpha' and aggressive."
If you know me, you know that I genuinely try to like every person that I meet and at least give them a chance, and more often than not quite a few chances before I make judgement calls about their character. If this is the view that you have of people that lift weights, I guess that's fine, but I hope that I've at least cleared up some misconceptions about us gym rats!
If you need me I'll be wearing a shirt that's too small, drinking Arnold Palmer out of my shaker bottle and asking everyone entering the library if they even lift.
Until next time!
Josh
Monday, February 9, 2015
Distance Hurts
Distance hurts. Obviously, the subject of distance has been something that I have been all too acquainted with over the years of being a missionary and third culture kid. When I entered the 7th grade, 12 years old at International Community School, I also entered a country and new world in which I knew absolutely no one other than my family, and was over 9,000 miles away from my nearest notion of home.
But distance becomes more and more painful of a reality as I grow older. Yesterday, I said goodbye to my amazing girlfriend again and watched her drive off to put 300 miles of separation between my hand and hers. It is certainly my belief that God puts trials and situations in our lives to make us stronger people, so I do not resent Him for bringing me together with a girl with whom I can't be "together" with as much as I would desire, but that won't ever cause the pain of her being gone to subside.
I believe that the idea of unwilling separation is simply a result of the fallen state of humanity. Adam and Eve walked together with God, and communed with him. The nature of their own pre-fall relationship was laid out clearly in Genesis 2 when God said "Therefore, a man will... hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." When they sinned, they not only separated themselves from God through hiding, but also opened themselves to the eventual reality of imperfect human relationships, including but not limited to the problem of distance between partners. Likewise, the need for a savior of all mankind is summed up in the fact that there is now a distance between man and God, an enmity that affects the relationship we need to have true freedom to be who He intended us to be.
In the same way, the pain that is brought about by lacking a physical unity with those that we love is a result of the fallen world that we live in. Though I am grateful for the technological ways I have access to in order to communicate with and feel closer to Kathryn, there is nothing that can substitute having her beside me and physically having my arm around her.
I pray daily that Christ, the author and perfecter of our faith would sustain both Kat and I as we seek to honor him through our relationship and selflessly care for each other. And I also pray that because he is the perfect reconciler of all things great and small, that he would provide for us to see each other and eventually live in the same place.
Some application for all couples: If your significant other lives on the same campus as you, or if you have the ability to see your loved one on a daily basis, praise God that he has given you that gift. And if God has blessed you with the difficult blessing of a long distance relationship, praise God that he has given you that gift. Because I do consider it a daily blessing and the most precious privilege to date a girl who is worth EVERY second that I spend missing her and a million more. It has been difficult at times, like when I wonder if she is safe and desire to serve her in many ways that distance makes impossible.
But you know what? I HOPE that the evil one has seen my relationship with Kat as a threat to his dominion. I HOPE that we are worthy of his nervous attention and attacks! I HOPE that he has quivered in fear that we will do ministry together (as we plan on doing this summer, Lord willing), and I hope that God humiliates him by continuing to keep Kat and I humble and joyful in the face of the reality of the broken world that we are living in.
I have become more of a prayer warrior through feeling completely inadequate and powerless to take care of any of Kathryn's daily needs. I have learned new ways to express my feelings and make her feel loved, such as sending small gifts and packages, and lots of letters! And the most important thing is that with the hope of someday doing ministry in difficult places, God has taught both of us to press on for something that we value and deeply desire, even in the face of less than ideal and difficult situations.
And there is no person alive that I would rather have accompany me on this journey than her. And there is no one that could sustain it besides the awesome God we love and serve... together.
But distance becomes more and more painful of a reality as I grow older. Yesterday, I said goodbye to my amazing girlfriend again and watched her drive off to put 300 miles of separation between my hand and hers. It is certainly my belief that God puts trials and situations in our lives to make us stronger people, so I do not resent Him for bringing me together with a girl with whom I can't be "together" with as much as I would desire, but that won't ever cause the pain of her being gone to subside.
I believe that the idea of unwilling separation is simply a result of the fallen state of humanity. Adam and Eve walked together with God, and communed with him. The nature of their own pre-fall relationship was laid out clearly in Genesis 2 when God said "Therefore, a man will... hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." When they sinned, they not only separated themselves from God through hiding, but also opened themselves to the eventual reality of imperfect human relationships, including but not limited to the problem of distance between partners. Likewise, the need for a savior of all mankind is summed up in the fact that there is now a distance between man and God, an enmity that affects the relationship we need to have true freedom to be who He intended us to be.
In the same way, the pain that is brought about by lacking a physical unity with those that we love is a result of the fallen world that we live in. Though I am grateful for the technological ways I have access to in order to communicate with and feel closer to Kathryn, there is nothing that can substitute having her beside me and physically having my arm around her.
I pray daily that Christ, the author and perfecter of our faith would sustain both Kat and I as we seek to honor him through our relationship and selflessly care for each other. And I also pray that because he is the perfect reconciler of all things great and small, that he would provide for us to see each other and eventually live in the same place.
Some application for all couples: If your significant other lives on the same campus as you, or if you have the ability to see your loved one on a daily basis, praise God that he has given you that gift. And if God has blessed you with the difficult blessing of a long distance relationship, praise God that he has given you that gift. Because I do consider it a daily blessing and the most precious privilege to date a girl who is worth EVERY second that I spend missing her and a million more. It has been difficult at times, like when I wonder if she is safe and desire to serve her in many ways that distance makes impossible.
But you know what? I HOPE that the evil one has seen my relationship with Kat as a threat to his dominion. I HOPE that we are worthy of his nervous attention and attacks! I HOPE that he has quivered in fear that we will do ministry together (as we plan on doing this summer, Lord willing), and I hope that God humiliates him by continuing to keep Kat and I humble and joyful in the face of the reality of the broken world that we are living in.
I have become more of a prayer warrior through feeling completely inadequate and powerless to take care of any of Kathryn's daily needs. I have learned new ways to express my feelings and make her feel loved, such as sending small gifts and packages, and lots of letters! And the most important thing is that with the hope of someday doing ministry in difficult places, God has taught both of us to press on for something that we value and deeply desire, even in the face of less than ideal and difficult situations.
And there is no person alive that I would rather have accompany me on this journey than her. And there is no one that could sustain it besides the awesome God we love and serve... together.
Monday, December 29, 2014
Exciting New Beginnings (Kathryn and I)
Despite the title of this article, I'm not a big believer in the "New Year, New Me" mindset that our culture loves (and reviles) this time of year. No, the new exciting beginnings that I refer to have come in the form of a new relationship in my life with my girlfriend, Kathryn.
Now, before you exit out of your browser in fear of a sappy, soppy gushing blog post, I promise I'll try to refrain from sharing all of my feelings about her, because I think I could write a book about all of that. But what I will try to convey is some of the processes that led me into a relationship with truly the most amazing girl I've ever met.
At the beginning of this year, I was very curious of what God might have in store for me in the area of a romantic relationship. Often times, I reasoned that I would just be "open" to the idea of a relationship. Unfortunately, for me at times this led into thinking that every cute girl that I met with a good personality could potentially be a girlfriend of mine.
Fortunately though, God has his ways of teaching us lessons, and he used my calling to clearly reveal to me that every single one of the girls that I had potentially considered was not called into the same arena of ministry that I was, and did not fit with the gifting and calling that God had placed upon my life. At the same time, close friends in my life pointed out specific areas of spiritual weakness that I needed to resolve and focus on with a renewed determination. This and other clear instances of God speaking to me led me into a period of truly and intentionally waiting on the Lord and his timing, not pursuing relationships of my own accord, but realizing that intimacy with Christ is more satisfying than anything I could ever hope to achieve with a girl outside of His perfect will.
God taught me so much more through this time of singleness, through my church, small group, personal relationship with my small group leader, roommate, basketball team, professors and classes in the short span of one semester that I stand at the end of it amazed that I could change and develop so much in such a short time. And truly, it would be humanly impossible, so I can only attribute it to the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit inside of me.
So, where does Kathryn enter the picture? Well, Kathryn and I had met at summer camp last July, and had a very long and deep talk about ministry, our lives and school. I had thoroughly enjoyed our conversation, but nothing came out of it except becoming friends on Facebook and following her on Instagram. As the year carried on, I continued to see her genuine heart for the Lord through her posts, many of which were artistic scripture letterings. I also saw that her heart for children and cross-cultural ministry that we had spoken about before was very genuine, not something that she talked about but never practiced.
And without thinking too much of it, I wrote her a happy birthday message on November 4th, and included the two words "Miss you" and a happy face. Kathryn has since told me that she had a discussion with her roommate as to the implication of those two words, but the small post later led to me striking up a conversation, which eventually led to the two of us meeting up when she came through Chicago after Thanksgiving to visit family.
And... I must say, I was confused by our time. Not because of anything that she said, not because of any relational problem, but I was confused because I had begun to develop feelings for her, both through speaking with her often over social media and having VERY MUCH enjoyed our time together, walking, talking and laughing. There were so many things that attracted me to her, like her sincere heart in pursuing Christ, and her encouraging, joyful demeanor.
But I was supposed to be single!
As you can imagine, I was in a bit of a dilemma. God had been growing and molding me SO much, and I was excited to share that with someone who understood and who also sought to grow daily in her relationship with Him. So I started praying, and I started reading the Bible. And with each passing day, my feelings for her started to grow and grow. The guys on my floor noticed first. They'd wonder who I was texting, snapchatting, and why I was walking around the floor with a huge goofy grin painted on my face.
As I continued to seek God's will for me, He began to give me the confidence that going forward was the right thing to do. And I must admit that like Gideon, I struggled to believe God the first time he told me to go forward, as well as the second... and third...
But eventually, it became crystal clear to me that she was the girl that God had been shaping me for and preparing me for this semester. Perhaps to an outsider it might seem as if I'm projecting my own view onto God's actions in my life, but I say this with complete assuredness that it is true— God led Kathryn and I to each other at exactly the perfect time in our lives, and though I cannot see the future, I have no doubt that she continually points me towards Christ in our relationship right now, and does not desire that I lift her up in place of my intimacy with the one who really matters.
Her joy, encouragement, loving demeanor, positive outlook, sincerity, selflessness, and affection has given me a more complete view of what the Father's love is like for us his children, and her perspective on scripture and life has been valuable and insightful in my own pursuit of God.
It has been incredible to see how much God has shaped me and molded me, finally into a man who can LEAD and run alongside a woman who is already desperately seeking after Christ with all her heart. And I don't doubt that we both have long roads ahead of us, whether together or apart, but I can say with complete confidence that my beautiful girlfriend has spurred me on toward the ultimate goal of Christ.
And not everything about our relationship is purely spiritual. I just REALLY enjoy being around her and just talking with her. She's got a wonderful sense of humor and stunning outward beauty to match her breathtaking inner beauty. She doesn't mind that I talk a lot when she makes me nervous; she sits back and listens to me with her bright blue eyes and smiles, because she likes to listen.
Just as much has God has led both of us spiritually throughout the years to this point where we can now, despite our own inadequacies and shortcomings, point each other heavenward through the power of the Holy Spirit, he has also crafted our personalities, strengths and weaknesses, preferences and senses of humor to come together in a lovely harmony that has become the relationship I now can so undeservedly write about as my own.
And I know it's all very recent, and we're only in the first stages of our relationship. But I don't doubt for a moment that through seeking Christ and His will in our lives, this relationship will be a beautiful thing— more and more with each new sunrise, just as I learn and appreciate new aspects of Kathryn's beauty with each passing day, as I learned about God when I truly begun to pursue him passionately. Because even beautiful things have humble beginnings.
And this is the beginning of something beautiful.
Now, before you exit out of your browser in fear of a sappy, soppy gushing blog post, I promise I'll try to refrain from sharing all of my feelings about her, because I think I could write a book about all of that. But what I will try to convey is some of the processes that led me into a relationship with truly the most amazing girl I've ever met.
At the beginning of this year, I was very curious of what God might have in store for me in the area of a romantic relationship. Often times, I reasoned that I would just be "open" to the idea of a relationship. Unfortunately, for me at times this led into thinking that every cute girl that I met with a good personality could potentially be a girlfriend of mine.
Fortunately though, God has his ways of teaching us lessons, and he used my calling to clearly reveal to me that every single one of the girls that I had potentially considered was not called into the same arena of ministry that I was, and did not fit with the gifting and calling that God had placed upon my life. At the same time, close friends in my life pointed out specific areas of spiritual weakness that I needed to resolve and focus on with a renewed determination. This and other clear instances of God speaking to me led me into a period of truly and intentionally waiting on the Lord and his timing, not pursuing relationships of my own accord, but realizing that intimacy with Christ is more satisfying than anything I could ever hope to achieve with a girl outside of His perfect will.
God taught me so much more through this time of singleness, through my church, small group, personal relationship with my small group leader, roommate, basketball team, professors and classes in the short span of one semester that I stand at the end of it amazed that I could change and develop so much in such a short time. And truly, it would be humanly impossible, so I can only attribute it to the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit inside of me.
So, where does Kathryn enter the picture? Well, Kathryn and I had met at summer camp last July, and had a very long and deep talk about ministry, our lives and school. I had thoroughly enjoyed our conversation, but nothing came out of it except becoming friends on Facebook and following her on Instagram. As the year carried on, I continued to see her genuine heart for the Lord through her posts, many of which were artistic scripture letterings. I also saw that her heart for children and cross-cultural ministry that we had spoken about before was very genuine, not something that she talked about but never practiced.
And without thinking too much of it, I wrote her a happy birthday message on November 4th, and included the two words "Miss you" and a happy face. Kathryn has since told me that she had a discussion with her roommate as to the implication of those two words, but the small post later led to me striking up a conversation, which eventually led to the two of us meeting up when she came through Chicago after Thanksgiving to visit family.
And... I must say, I was confused by our time. Not because of anything that she said, not because of any relational problem, but I was confused because I had begun to develop feelings for her, both through speaking with her often over social media and having VERY MUCH enjoyed our time together, walking, talking and laughing. There were so many things that attracted me to her, like her sincere heart in pursuing Christ, and her encouraging, joyful demeanor.
But I was supposed to be single!
As you can imagine, I was in a bit of a dilemma. God had been growing and molding me SO much, and I was excited to share that with someone who understood and who also sought to grow daily in her relationship with Him. So I started praying, and I started reading the Bible. And with each passing day, my feelings for her started to grow and grow. The guys on my floor noticed first. They'd wonder who I was texting, snapchatting, and why I was walking around the floor with a huge goofy grin painted on my face.
As I continued to seek God's will for me, He began to give me the confidence that going forward was the right thing to do. And I must admit that like Gideon, I struggled to believe God the first time he told me to go forward, as well as the second... and third...
But eventually, it became crystal clear to me that she was the girl that God had been shaping me for and preparing me for this semester. Perhaps to an outsider it might seem as if I'm projecting my own view onto God's actions in my life, but I say this with complete assuredness that it is true— God led Kathryn and I to each other at exactly the perfect time in our lives, and though I cannot see the future, I have no doubt that she continually points me towards Christ in our relationship right now, and does not desire that I lift her up in place of my intimacy with the one who really matters.
Her joy, encouragement, loving demeanor, positive outlook, sincerity, selflessness, and affection has given me a more complete view of what the Father's love is like for us his children, and her perspective on scripture and life has been valuable and insightful in my own pursuit of God.
It has been incredible to see how much God has shaped me and molded me, finally into a man who can LEAD and run alongside a woman who is already desperately seeking after Christ with all her heart. And I don't doubt that we both have long roads ahead of us, whether together or apart, but I can say with complete confidence that my beautiful girlfriend has spurred me on toward the ultimate goal of Christ.
And not everything about our relationship is purely spiritual. I just REALLY enjoy being around her and just talking with her. She's got a wonderful sense of humor and stunning outward beauty to match her breathtaking inner beauty. She doesn't mind that I talk a lot when she makes me nervous; she sits back and listens to me with her bright blue eyes and smiles, because she likes to listen.
Just as much has God has led both of us spiritually throughout the years to this point where we can now, despite our own inadequacies and shortcomings, point each other heavenward through the power of the Holy Spirit, he has also crafted our personalities, strengths and weaknesses, preferences and senses of humor to come together in a lovely harmony that has become the relationship I now can so undeservedly write about as my own.
And I know it's all very recent, and we're only in the first stages of our relationship. But I don't doubt for a moment that through seeking Christ and His will in our lives, this relationship will be a beautiful thing— more and more with each new sunrise, just as I learn and appreciate new aspects of Kathryn's beauty with each passing day, as I learned about God when I truly begun to pursue him passionately. Because even beautiful things have humble beginnings.
And this is the beginning of something beautiful.
Saturday, December 13, 2014
Brand New Jordans
For basketball players, sometimes swag is everything. Now, before you exit out of this tab because of such an ignorant sounding introduction, bear with me. As with many other things in life, basketball has a culture. Whether you agree with it or not, I will try to explain it as objectively as I can.
Playing basketball in the City of Chicago has introduced me into a world where #BallIsLife. Basketball is life to many of the men in this city. There are hundreds of songs talking about how good one is at basketball, and the validation people feel through basketball is unfortunately one of the greatest fulfillments they ever get in their lives! I have seen (and felt) punches thrown, heard all kinds of foul language, and even had a gun pulled just off the court I was playing on, all while playing basketball.
And though the simple idolatry of basketball could be the subject of many blog posts, I will focus on one aspect of that culture.
Appearance.
Appearance is SO critical, especially in Chicago. If you're not rich, you should at least LOOK rich. If you can't ball, you should at least LOOK like you ball. And the most critical piece of the appearance of a baller is their shoes.
If you're wearing an off-brand, you're immediately written off as a complete scrub. If you try to come out to the court wearing New Balance, Asics, or anything in that arena of shoe brands, you have already been discounted in the hearts of those on the court as a loser, before you've even set foot on the hardwood or touched a ball. If you have Addidas, it's only okay if it's a Derrick Rose signature shoe. If you have Nike, you're playing it safe, though there are some high end signature shoes, such as Kobe's or KD's (Kevin Durant) that will earn you some respect.
But nothing will earn you as much respect as coming onto the court wearing a clean pair of Jordans. You've probably heard of them. There are MANY songs dedicated to Jordans, to shoes. The amount of respect given to the owner of a new pair of Jordans is unreal. People have literally killed other people in order to steal their Jordans, and a new pair can cost anywhere from $105 to well over 300$ and much more for other limited editions.
I must admit that at times I have fallen into this craze, unfortunately. I currently own two pairs of Jordans, though both are the cheapest ones on the market, and one I got for half price.
Tonight I went to a Big Bro Big Sis party wearing those same Jordans, and there was a game that involved throwing HUNDREDS of little marshmallows into boxes for each team. Perhaps as expected, hundreds of the squishy sugar missiles actually ended up on the floor, only to be trampled into an unrecognizable viscous pulp all over the carpet. As I moved in to help try to clean up some of the mess, I realized something uncomfortable. My Jordans were getting disgustingly coated in the sticky pink goop on the floor, picking up all kinds of black debris and hair, and generally diminishing their cool factor.
I must admit that my first reaction was to draw back, thinking, "I can't get these dirty!"
Then I was convicted of my selfishness.
So much of ministry involves throwing aside things in this world that we value for ourselves for a greater eternal prize. As I sheepishly started scraping the gunk off the floor, I realized that if I'm unable to get my Jordans sticky and dirty, then I'm not fit for ministry. What would happen if God were to ask me to give up a relationship, a habit, or a hobby to follow him into an uncomfortable ministry or situation? Would I do it?
Perhaps this analogy will only make sense to you if you are a basketball player and understand the importance of looking good in front of other people. Unfortunately, one of the things that the church as a whole struggles with today is being honest about our brokenness instead of putting up a front of perfection and happiness.
As I think about it in retrospect, I would rather have my Jordans in life destroyed, worn off my feet by miles of unabashed and relentless ministry, without stopping one time to clean them off. My appearance DOES NOT MATTER! What does matter is the glorification of my righteous, holy and infinite God.
A righteous life isn't something that we get by hiding or suppressing our own sin so other people don't see. A righteous life is the result of CONFESSING the ways that we fail on a daily basis both to God and to other believers, so that we can receive forgiveness which leads us to live a life that is a reflection of the grace that we have received.
Also, ministry is traveling into places where we sacrifice worldly things that we value and hold so tightly for heavenly purposes. The Bible says in Romans 10 "How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things!" It does not say beautiful are the feet of those that wear fresh and clean Jordans. It does NOT say clean are the feet of those who preach the gospel.
Beautiful. How beautiful.
I am proud to say that my feet were more beautiful to my Heavenly Father by the end of the night, when there was dirt, hair and sticky goo caked onto my shoes. Pray that God will bring you to situations in which you get your metaphorical J's dirty. What things do you value? Are those things bringing honor and glory to God in your life? And if they are not, are you willing to sacrifice what the world tells you they should look like to submit to the will of God?
It's worth it. I promise. Not once have I regretted putting aside earthly things for the sake of infinite reward. And even though my J's have a little more pink stuck on to them than I began the night with, they're more beautiful that way.
Sunday, November 9, 2014
A Radical Life
I'll let you in on a little secret— I've always idolized radical lives. When I was a kid, my parents read me missionary biographies every night before bed. I ate up stories of World War pilots and soldiers who risked everything, even some who sacrificed their lives for what they believed in. I read Tom Clancy books when I was barely a teenager, and devoured Robinson Crusoe cover to cover at least 5 times. My childhood hero Nate Saint tied this radical life in with my fascination for airplanes that I had as a child.
If you don't know his story, he was one of the four missionaries that accompanied Jim Elliot and was eventually martyred for his boldness, leaving behind a son and a wife and paving the way for a tribe of people to eventually hear the gospel.
Unfortunately enough, I think that modern day evangelicalism quietly pushes their stories away without much recognition. Tragically, when I hear stories about modern evangelicals that lived radical lives for Jesus and were eventually killed for their boldness in proclaiming the gospel, the first words that come out of a Christian's mouth acknowledge their boldness, but in the same breath question their methods, suggesting that we Christians be more "prudent" in our approach.
That really pisses me off.
I can't help but to wonder if the disciples could have been more "prudent" in the way that they were martyred in sharing the faith. And though I'm aware that there are many places to share the gospel that there is no risk, and there is certainly need there as well, unfortunately, our "prudence" has led to around a BILLION people on this earth who have never heard the gospel. Never. Not once.
Tears are clouding my eyes as I write this, and I can't ever think about the lost people in this world without my heart breaking for them. I know what it's like to be enslaved to sin. I am in no way more righteous than any one of them, but I grew up in a church with a family and community who pointed me constantly to Christ. Despite this, still I rejected him at so many different moments through my life, spurning him for earthly pleasures and empty fantasies.
Yes, my heart breaks for those who have never heard the gospel. Unfortunately, our "prudence" and our "political correctness" is daily allowing people to sink into an eternity apart from God, because we don't have the courage to GO and MAKE DISCIPLES of lost people.
Look at your own life. Is your relationship with Christ worth sacrificing your life for? Would you proclaim the gospel with your last breath, staring down the barrel of a loaded gun? Would you go to a far away country, following the call of God to a place from which you might never return?
If the answer is no because God has called you to something else, then that's WONDERFUL. Missionaries need support, prayer, and the gospel needs to be preached even in primarily Christian areas as well.
But if the answer is no because you're not "comfortable" with it, or it wouldn't be "prudent," then sorry for my anger, but I have no doubt that people who denied following God's call on their lives are the reason that thousands of people die every day without ever hearing the gospel. And though God is sovereign, this is why I put the blame on the hands of people, and not upon his hands.
For whatever reason, God has chosen to work through the Church to accomplish his purposes on the earth. Unfortunately, as I have seen so many times in my life, the Church is crippled by imperfection, a sin nature, and fallen human fragility. But still, God uses it. And perhaps because of the Church's partial ineptitude, the Gospel has failed to reach the world.
So what can we do to change it? Or perhaps more importantly, how can God change that through and despite the broken mess that is me.
The answer that he has given me is this: a radical life.
A life without the human "prudence" that has led to the systematic paralyzation of the battle ready Church that is modeled in Scripture and in the Apostolic Church. A life that does not cower back from enemies that rely upon human strength and false gods to receive their power. A life that fights against the invisible, insidious and infectious disease that is complacency.
I will not seek out death for the gospel, but neither will I cower in the face of it, because my God is more powerful than any other power. I will count my life on earth as nothing, because I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but he lives in me.
And this radical life starts on my knees in the morning. It starts through reading Scripture and being conformed to the likeness of Christ slowly through the power of the Spirit. It comes through the systematic diminishment of myself, and the inversely proportional and ever increasing presence of Jesus in my heart. It comes from a life of humility, one that is not afraid to confess sin and failure and turn them in for the abounding and completely undeserved grace of a perfect, sacrificial, incarnate God who became sin for us so we could become his righteousness. Righteousness we could never earn.
I don't pursue a radical life because it will get me to heaven or gain me favor with God. I will from this day forth pursue a radical life dedicated to glorifying and lifting high Jesus' name because he first lived a radical life for me, sacrificing his heavenly throne to save a wretch like me.
I live for nothing less than knowing God and making him known to all.
Please if you have reached the end of this, lift me up in prayer, that I will seek God in every moment of my existence, conforming myself to his plan for me, no matter what the cost. And pray for the people who have never heard. Pray that they will be able to hold on until someone reaches them and shows them the beauty of a truth that saves. Pray that more radical people would arise from the church, with no fear. Pray that every Christian would someday come to the point where they could sacrifice their lives for a God who first sacrificed his life for them.
And listen for God's call on your life. Pray he would make himself known to you more and more.
If you don't know his story, he was one of the four missionaries that accompanied Jim Elliot and was eventually martyred for his boldness, leaving behind a son and a wife and paving the way for a tribe of people to eventually hear the gospel.
Unfortunately enough, I think that modern day evangelicalism quietly pushes their stories away without much recognition. Tragically, when I hear stories about modern evangelicals that lived radical lives for Jesus and were eventually killed for their boldness in proclaiming the gospel, the first words that come out of a Christian's mouth acknowledge their boldness, but in the same breath question their methods, suggesting that we Christians be more "prudent" in our approach.
That really pisses me off.
I can't help but to wonder if the disciples could have been more "prudent" in the way that they were martyred in sharing the faith. And though I'm aware that there are many places to share the gospel that there is no risk, and there is certainly need there as well, unfortunately, our "prudence" has led to around a BILLION people on this earth who have never heard the gospel. Never. Not once.
Tears are clouding my eyes as I write this, and I can't ever think about the lost people in this world without my heart breaking for them. I know what it's like to be enslaved to sin. I am in no way more righteous than any one of them, but I grew up in a church with a family and community who pointed me constantly to Christ. Despite this, still I rejected him at so many different moments through my life, spurning him for earthly pleasures and empty fantasies.
Yes, my heart breaks for those who have never heard the gospel. Unfortunately, our "prudence" and our "political correctness" is daily allowing people to sink into an eternity apart from God, because we don't have the courage to GO and MAKE DISCIPLES of lost people.
Look at your own life. Is your relationship with Christ worth sacrificing your life for? Would you proclaim the gospel with your last breath, staring down the barrel of a loaded gun? Would you go to a far away country, following the call of God to a place from which you might never return?
If the answer is no because God has called you to something else, then that's WONDERFUL. Missionaries need support, prayer, and the gospel needs to be preached even in primarily Christian areas as well.
But if the answer is no because you're not "comfortable" with it, or it wouldn't be "prudent," then sorry for my anger, but I have no doubt that people who denied following God's call on their lives are the reason that thousands of people die every day without ever hearing the gospel. And though God is sovereign, this is why I put the blame on the hands of people, and not upon his hands.
For whatever reason, God has chosen to work through the Church to accomplish his purposes on the earth. Unfortunately, as I have seen so many times in my life, the Church is crippled by imperfection, a sin nature, and fallen human fragility. But still, God uses it. And perhaps because of the Church's partial ineptitude, the Gospel has failed to reach the world.
So what can we do to change it? Or perhaps more importantly, how can God change that through and despite the broken mess that is me.
The answer that he has given me is this: a radical life.
A life without the human "prudence" that has led to the systematic paralyzation of the battle ready Church that is modeled in Scripture and in the Apostolic Church. A life that does not cower back from enemies that rely upon human strength and false gods to receive their power. A life that fights against the invisible, insidious and infectious disease that is complacency.
I will not seek out death for the gospel, but neither will I cower in the face of it, because my God is more powerful than any other power. I will count my life on earth as nothing, because I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but he lives in me.
And this radical life starts on my knees in the morning. It starts through reading Scripture and being conformed to the likeness of Christ slowly through the power of the Spirit. It comes through the systematic diminishment of myself, and the inversely proportional and ever increasing presence of Jesus in my heart. It comes from a life of humility, one that is not afraid to confess sin and failure and turn them in for the abounding and completely undeserved grace of a perfect, sacrificial, incarnate God who became sin for us so we could become his righteousness. Righteousness we could never earn.
I don't pursue a radical life because it will get me to heaven or gain me favor with God. I will from this day forth pursue a radical life dedicated to glorifying and lifting high Jesus' name because he first lived a radical life for me, sacrificing his heavenly throne to save a wretch like me.
I live for nothing less than knowing God and making him known to all.
Please if you have reached the end of this, lift me up in prayer, that I will seek God in every moment of my existence, conforming myself to his plan for me, no matter what the cost. And pray for the people who have never heard. Pray that they will be able to hold on until someone reaches them and shows them the beauty of a truth that saves. Pray that more radical people would arise from the church, with no fear. Pray that every Christian would someday come to the point where they could sacrifice their lives for a God who first sacrificed his life for them.
And listen for God's call on your life. Pray he would make himself known to you more and more.
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